This article first appeared in The Edge Malaysia Weekly on November 18, 2024 - November 24, 2024

This International Men’s Day, let’s take a moment to reflect on men’s unique challenges: societal expectations, the myth of unyielding masculinity and the pressure to always have a plan (or at least pretend that there is one). Men, we see you.

Although the day centres on men’s well-being, it also opens up broader questions about equity and the ways rigid expectations affect everyone. Enter Kamala Harris: her rise in politics, while celebrated as a triumph for women, holds unexpected lessons that resonate for men as well.

Growing up, I had one of those moments one never quite forgets. At nine years old, I filled out a school form declaring my ambition to be the prime minister of Malaysia.

When the teacher laughed and suggested I “choose something realistic”, I felt like the ultimate dream deflation balloon. But here’s the thing: When Harris became the first woman, black woman and South Asian woman to serve as US vice-president, I was thrilled. She has inspired a generation by showing that ambitions, no matter how big, are achievable.

As her potential path to the presidency unfolds, the conversations surrounding her candidacy sometimes feel like an emotional obstacle course challenge. Many discussions have turned her leadership into a litmus test for gender support. Any critique risks being seen as anti-feminist. Have we gone too far in trying to box in equity? Perhaps. True equity is about everyone having the right to dream without being handed a new set of rules that trap them in a different way.

Harris, like many women in boardrooms, often faces scrutiny not just on policies but on whether she “fits” the mould of leadership. If she is assertive, she is “too aggressive”; if she is warm, she is “not decisive enough”. Sound familiar?

Many men in corporate roles face similar unspoken rules. They must lead but stay invulnerable, project strength without ever calling in “sick with feelings”. These stereotypes were not designed for anyone, but they stick around. And here’s the catch: just as voters are asked to evaluate Harris beyond her identity, corporate leaders should challenge themselves to see people for their abilities.

While women break through glass ceilings, men often find themselves staring at “glass walls” that trap them in traditional roles. These invisible barriers dictate that men should strive endlessly, avoid vulnerability and definitely not admit that work stress feels like a minefield.

This pressure can lead to mental health struggles, burnout and a feeling of being locked into unspoken rules of masculinity. True equity involves dismantling these glass walls for men just as much as glass ceilings for women. Because honestly, who wants to feel like they are playing an endless game of Corporate Jenga?

Datuk Lee Chong Wei, one of Malaysia’s most celebrated athletes, has openly shared about his struggles with mental health in the high-stakes world of sports.

His story resonates with many men, reminding us that mental well-being is everyone’s business. And we cannot forget Tan Sri Michelle Yeoh or Datuk Nicol David — powerhouses who show that success comes in many forms. These icons break through the “shoulds” of their industries, reminding us that equity is about creating supportive environments for everyone, without judgement or limiting labels.

So, as you read this, perhaps post-election, here are the real questions: Where did you stand? Did you see Harris’ identity as an asset, or were you (understandably) just trying to get past identity politics altogether? In the workplace, are you more inclined to support leaders who reflect your experience, or do you see value in those with perspectives different from your own?

Ultimately, whether we are talking politics, boardrooms or everyday life, true equity is about valuing people for what they bring, not who they are by birth. This International Men’s Day, let’s commit to building balanced workplaces that support men’s mental health while fostering equity for all. After all, if we let go of outdated stereotypes and unspoken rules, we might just find a way to move forward together.

Low Ngai Yuen is the chief merchandise and marketing officer for retailer AEON (M) Co Bhd, and serves two other public-listed companies: GDEX Bhd and OCK Group Bhd. In 2013, she founded Pertubuhan Pembangunan Kendiri Wanita Dan Gadis (WOMEN:girls). She sits on the Pahang Economic Advisory Council 2024/5 and is in the steering committee of the 30% Club Malaysia. These are her personal views.

This op-ed is part of a thought leadership series — Equity, Equality, Prosperity, by diverse voices for inclusion — in collaboration with 30% Club Malaysia, which is part of a global business campaign.

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